And the thing I hate most is to be alone.
It just feels so empty.
So lonely.
Makes my thoughts run wild.
And I can't think properly.

And I hated that kinda joke.
The joke which wasn't funny.
The joke that lied.
The joke that made me feel so fooled.
Its a lie, I knew it, but you had to force it upon me.
And now that I found out the real truth.
It justs makes me wonder.
When I feel this way, does it make you feel happier?
I don't like to entertain, especially when its at the expense of me.

I had a nightmare last night.
And it really scared me.
It was nothing much.
Really nothing much.
But it just mattered to me.
I woke up in the middle of the night, just sitting there, wondering.
And the fact that I had school then after made me fall asleep again.
I'm afraid that one day that'd happen.
I can't do much, but cross my fingers, and just hope.

I don't even dare say sorry like how I used to.
And its all thanks to you.
Sorry doesn't matter if I haven't learnt anything from it.
And I were to commit the same mistake again, what for say sorry?
Thats what you said.
And I never dared say sorry again when I know I'm going to make the same mistake.
I just can't forget all the horrible things you said.
I'm not one who forgets the past easily.
I still remember Chua Eileen, and Victoria, and what they said to me.
Its just like a living nightmare, when I'm alone and I start thinking about crazy stuff.

What right do I have?
Maybe I should just give up.
For fear that some may find out one day.
Wheres the one?
Maybe its all part of retribution.

I shall not crap everyone else's mood.
Good night...
I just feel wrong troubling you whenever I have a problem.
Thats why I no longer talk to you.
Cause I'm not a good friend.
BSJY.